The Truth About Energy: Why Some Places and People Drain You
Have you ever walked into a room and immediately felt uncomfortable—even when nothing “bad” was happening? Or left a conversation feeling like someone siphoned your soul through a straw?
You’re not imagining things. You’re experiencing energy.
As women we’ve lived enough life to trust our gut… and yet, we still sometimes second-guess it. Especially when it comes to how people or places affect us. But here’s the truth: your energy is sacred, and not everyone (or everything) deserves access to it.
It’s Not Something You’re Imagining —It’s Science and Self-Awareness
Let’s break it down. Everything is made up of energy. Physics agrees, and so does your nervous system. Certain people or environments emit frequencies that either harmonize with yours or disrupt it. You’ve probably experienced this with people who make you feel light, seen, and safe—and the opposite with those who make your shoulders tense and your jaw clench.
That shift you feel? That’s your body’s way of signaling a mismatch. It’s a real response, not just “being dramatic” or “too sensitive.”
People Can Be Drainers (Even If They’re Nice)
It’s not just the obvious toxic personalities—like the passive-aggressive coworker or the manipulative ex-friend. Sometimes it’s the well-meaning over-sharer, the constant complainer, or the one-upper who never lets you finish a sentence.
These people may not mean to drain you, but they still do. And part of reclaiming your energy in this stage of life is being brave enough to recognize that—even if it makes you feel “mean.”
Reminder: Boundaries aren’t mean. They’re necessary.
Environments Hold Energy Too
Ever walk into someone’s house and instantly feel the tension? Or walk into a cozy bookstore or a peaceful nature trail and feel your whole body exhale?
That’s environmental energy at work. Cluttered, chaotic, or emotionally charged spaces can take a toll on you. On the flip side, calm and intentional environments can recharge you.
So if you feel drained at work, a certain family member’s house, or even in your own home—it might not be you. It might be time for an energetic reset.
What You Can Do About It
Here’s how to start protecting and restoring your energy:
Notice the Shift – When you feel drained after interacting with someone or spending time somewhere, don’t ignore it. Get curious about what caused it.
Set Clear Boundaries – It’s okay to limit your exposure to people or places that deplete you. You don’t need a dramatic exit—sometimes a slow fade or “I’m unavailable right now” is enough.
Cleanse Your Space – Open a window. Declutter. Light a candle. Play music that lifts you. Create an environment that feels like a hug, not a headache.
Recharge on Purpose – Take time to be alone, in nature, or with people who make you laugh, inspire you, or let you be fully yourself.
Trust Your Body – Your nervous system is wise. When you feel tension, fatigue, or unease after a person or place—it’s not random. It’s a signal.
You’re Allowed to Outgrow Energy That No Longer Fits
Your energy is precious. You’ve earned the right to be selective. You’re not here to babysit bad vibes or entertain draining dynamics.
Protect your peace. Because the truth about energy? It’s not just about who or what’s around you—it’s about what you’re willing to allow into your sacred space.
Jill K Schmidt